Possession Obsession

Bucket of suds and an over-sized sponge – what a way to spend Father’s Day – washing and waxing your most prized possession. Have you ever been curious about people who obsess over their cars? What drives them to spit-polish the mirror every time they go for a spin. Or spend 2 hours with an Oral B toothbrush cleaning the rims.

Makes you wonder how they would be on a date. What if you had a piece of spring leaf lettuce in your teeth at lunch? Or the sweater you were wearing was hanging slightly crooked? I can just envision an uninvited adjustment to make all things perfect…at least visually.

When someone is that fixated on the condition of something, is it possible to ever relax enough to simply enjoy the “something?”

Maybe before you venture into a relationship with an individual, it would be a good idea to pull up a chair in the driveway and watch this potential date wash their car before you end up as the object of their "possession obsession."

Thoughts?
Mama j

Under Insured

Have you looked at the bill for your car insurance lately? Every month, I like to rip the bill open with thrilling expectation in the hopes that my insurance company is going to throw in cruise tickets with the premium I pay for my teens. Nope.

Is there any doubt why teen insurance is two and a half times that of your parents? Reckless abandon with a splash of false immortality – that’s how some teens drive.

So here’s a question for you, how many opportunities do you have in a week to crack your windshield, hit a mailbox or worse, get in a car accident? Plenty, right? Then how much more likely is it that you have a “relationship accident?” Think about the opportunity you have every day to make a “wrong turn” when it comes to the opposite sex. What do you think your parent’s should be willing to pay for “dating insurance” to give them the peace of mind that their little darling is not going to be in a relationship wreck this month?

Hey! Maybe I’m onto something! A new business idea; I can sell “dating insurance” to cover all the hazards of teen dating. The list could include everything from failing grades to excessive cell phone bills. It would be comprehensive coverage that insured migraines, dating under the influence, pregnancy, harassment and even time off of school for “repair and restoration.”

The best part? I would throw in a “loaner date” when the one you invested in broke down and isn’t going anywhere.

Thoughts?
mama j

Give Me a Brake!

“That should solve your braking problem, ma’am,” as he handed me a bill for $260 bucks. I paid the bill and wondered if this would be a permanent fix – yea, right.

Last week, I almost rear-ended another car when my brakes failed. Apparently, the brake pads need to be changed more than say, once in a lifetime.

So this got me thinking about “brakes” and dating. How many times a month, week, day do you consciously (or unconsciously) use your brakes in a relationship? Do you stop short of saying what’s on your mind? Keep yourself from accepting an invitation to trouble? Bring an unhealthy relationship to a dead stand still?

Here is what I know; it has to be your OWN foot that hits the brake – not the other guy. Your brain sends a message to your body to act on the fact that braking is necessary in that moment. If you choose not to respond to that message, you are apt to regret it. When you fail to use your brakes, the police officer doesn’t give you a break on the ticket, right? So why do you expect to get a break when you choose not to brake in a relationship?

After you have been driving for a while, braking is instinctive. How long do you have to date someone before you have a safe braking response that just comes naturally – without a thought?

Thoughts?
Mama j

Mama j moment

Mother's Day Moment

Hmmm…What does your mom want for Mother’s Day?

After careful consideration, there is only one thing I truly want as a mom – for my kids to be safe and healthy. I took care of the healthy part years ago by cooking pot-roast in the crock pot instead of aluminum foil. Now, I only worry about their safety.

It started well before they were born. Prenatal vitamins, safety locks on the cupboards and a crib with rails that was FDA approved. Now, their safety is much less controllable; will my teen driver be safe on the road? Will my teen dater chose someone who will protect her heart, body and soul? Will my son drive recklessly or date recklessly?

The box of Elmo Band-Aids has faded and gathered dust over the years. I remember when a scraped knee or broken bone was my biggest daily concern. Now, there is no box of bandages big enough to patch up the fears we have as moms of teens. All we ask is that our babies travel the safest possible road and guard their lives at every turn.

What does your mom really want for Mother’s Day? The chance to tell you one more time to go slowly and look both ways…

Thoughts?
mama j

Curb Your Emotions

My neighborhood doesn’t have curbs. I’m not sure who decides whether or not to add curbs to the side of the road but regardless, it is pretty easy to tell when you have crossed the line; the feeling is completely different and it’s easy to lose control.

Curb. That is one of those words that sounds weird when you say it more than once. By definition, it means to “restrain, hold back, limit, control.”

If you’ve ever “accidentally” hit a curb, you are familiar with the jolt of the correction. Immediately, you are set back on course. No curb and it’s up to you to get back on course.
When I hear, “Curb your emotions,” I picture a little concrete wall that keeps me from getting out of line. Unfortunately, those little curbs are just that…little. Easy to jump and disregard.

So here’s a question, if you jump the curb and hit a tree, do you blame the city for not installing curbs? Maybe you blame the tree. If you lose your temper and damage a relationship, do you blame your parents for not “curbing your emotions?” Or maybe you just blame the person you damaged. Ouch.

Thoughts?
Mama j

Front End Alignment

My car keeps pulling to the left. If I let go of the wheel on a straight road right now, I will end up in a ditch. I’m guessing I need an adjustment. It is amazing how a little tweak of 1 or 2 degrees can make all the difference in the world.

It’s not just my car that needs the adjustment. More often that not, it’s me. Just a little tiny shift in tone, facial expression or word choice can make or break a relationship. I’m not talking about a radical overhaul – I’m talking about the compounding effects of the small choices over time. Get an oil change or not. Compliment her or not. Check the tires or not. Respect him or not.

Small but mighty, an alignment of positive choices over time will be the determining factors that will point to where you are in years to come - with or without a car, with or without a relationship.

Thoughts?
mama j