Are you guilty of "datejacking?"

I don't ever remember having to worry about someone wanting to steal my car. It was a 1971 Army green Plymouth Satellite with a custom dirt and rust camouflage pattern. Most people took one look and either laughed or gave me a pitiful look that read "Oh, you poor sweet girl! Driving that piece of junk will really ruin your reputation from which you will never recover."

Even if I had owned a little red convertible, I doubt I would have been worried about carjacking. It just didn't happen back then. We didn't put the roof up much less lock the car doors. Now, you have to "Club" your steering wheel just to drop something in the mail box.

Carjacking is basically stealing something that doesn't belong to you. It is an intentional override of boundaries, morals and good judgment. If you think about it, teen relationships often follow the same thought process. Maybe Josh didn't care that Kristin "belonged" to his best friend. Abby was just waiting for an opportunity to steal Tyler when Jamie wasn't looking.

Carjacking may be terrifying in the moment but as long as you come away unharmed, you are one lucky soul. "Datejacking," on the other hand is often devastating to a teenager far beyond filing a police report, especially if they go to school with the perpetrators.

Do you consider "datejacking" a crime?

Thoughts?
mama j

Michigan potholes

I talked with a high school student today who had a bit of difficulty with her car after hitting a pothole. I was expecting her to tell me that she got a flat tire but the damage was well beyond repair. It seems she broke the axle and the tire was lying on its side like a boneless chicken! Tough to drive that way, I'm sure.

Kind of reminds me of when couples hit a bump or pothole in their relationship. Maybe she caught him looking at another girl. Maybe he found out she was at the movies with friends when she said she was home sick. Maybe, there was a crater-sized lie that was uncovered.

Potholes in dating might only send your sunglasses flying across the dashboard or on the other hand, cause enough damage to total the relationship. Here's the point; you have to watch where you're going. From your perspective, the hazard might look like a pretty insignificant flaw. To your date, it might be more than enough to deflate any hope of reconciliation.

It is pretty easy to take a smooth ride for granted until we come to that place along the road that jars every notion of comfort. Be alert and avoid potholes. They can really change the mood.

Thoughts?
mama j

Fan the flames

Now, I have nothing against beautiful artwork - even if it is on a human being. Clothing styles, hair styles and even manicures can and are used to reflect of individuality. Even tattoos can be well done...In my opinion. What I recognize however, is that not everyone likes what I like. We all have different tastes and appreciation for a variety of art forms.

Let's look at tattoos as an example. You can tattoo just about any part of your body with a plethora of images, graphics, colors and shapes. You can permanently represent a family member, a football team, a flower or a gang sign. Regardless of what you choose to display on your skin, others will judge you based on that artwork. It changes who you are. It can't be helped. The problem is, it doesn't wash off.

So how do you that the tattoo you have your mind set on is a good choice? What research have you done? Do you know if your first interview for a job will end abruplty when the CEO sees your "sleeve" peeking out from under your shirt? Have you Googled the iguana you have chosen to see if it is the symbol of a drug cartel in Columbia?

This is not like an ugly green dress that makes you look fat or a haircut that causes people to gasp. Tattoos are permanent. What would happen if you had a practice run instead of the real deal? Maybe a really good fake "mock-up" that could give you a glimpse of the response before it's too late? Take a poll, get a survey, have people anonymously send you a note that describes their reaction. How would that change your decision?

I once had a boyfriend break up with me over a haircut. How many girls or guys will erase you from the potential "date list" when you come to school sporting flames. Other kids might think is cool to look at but that doesn't mean they'd date you.

Lots of people think the flames on this van are cool to see but if you had to choose one car - would it be this one? Your marketability is now next to nothing. Good luck.

Thoughts?
mama j

Rear view caught on film

NPR News had a great picture of a concept car from Japan that has replaced the rearview mirrors with little cameras that look like flashlights pointing backward. The cameras are always on.

Think about that for a minute. What if your entire past was on film? Everywhere you'd been, everything you had done...caught on tape. Every time you looked in the "rearview" mirror at past relationships, it was permanently burned into film? All the stupid stuff you said and did caught in a timeless stream of conviction for you to proudly show your next date. Bummer.

When I look in my rearview mirror, I sure hope what I was trying to leave behind is getting smaller...not being played on the big screen.

"Cut! Edit! Take 2!"

Thoughts?
mama j

Teens-Do you believe this to be true?

Looking for love?

It’s all about the numbers. A daily chart in the article about car ownership states that “LUXEMBOURG'S roads are jammed with 647 cars for every 1,000 people, the highest ownership rate in the world.”

Pretty scary statistic but not as crazy as the number of teens in our local high school.

With over 2,400 single, available teens in our High School alone, each student has about 1,200 members of the opposite sex to choose from daily. You can pick someone based on hair color, height, intellect, sports activity or even by lunch hour. You will have a hard time exhausting all the options. But if you do, you can always head to the football games and meet another thousand options from the rival school. Sweet!

Or is it? The problems with using school as a dating service are many:
1. Where is their past accident report?
2. What happens when you break up and you have to see them everyday in math class?
3. How do you make after school romantic when you just spent a whole day together in school?

Truth is, it’s so easy and comfortable at school that the effort that should go into getting to know another person is complete eliminated. No need to go to out to lunch, have a hot lunch at school with him. No need to drive over to her house when you can just walk to her locker. Why would you carry her books when books are online?

Dating is supposed to involve some participation on both sides. Let him call you and ask you out, don’t text message him in Brit Lit. How about a homemade Valentine instead of giving him a candy heart that says “U Rock” out of the box as you stand their eating the rest in front of him. That’s SO romantic!

Let me ask you this, if true love is graded on how much effort you put into your school-day-dating, what is your GPA?

Thoughts?
mama j

Filthy Filters

What exactly do air filters accomplish in a car? Well, they keep the junk that's in the atmosphere from getting into your engine. If your filters' dirty, that nasty stuff is getting in there.

I've met people that have that effect on others, especially couples who are dating. Let's say one is pretty scuzzy to be around. After a while, your filter gets clogged and next thing you know, their junk gets past your filter and you start behaving just like them.

Routine maintenance means you check under your own hood once in a while and take a close look at what is getting past the filter...and why.


Time for a replacement?

Thoughts?
mama j